How To End A Long Distance Relationship?

How to end a long distance relationship? Today, our way of finding a partner and even keeping that bond afloat often takes place in the world of technology. Sometimes our love is hundreds of miles away, in other countries, in other cities. In case the affection fades, it is necessary to take the step and tell the other person what is happening.

We would not be wrong if we said that very few people dominate this competition: that of saying goodbye, that of ending that bond. Those who opt for ghosting abound , that is, cutting off communication from one day to the next without giving an explanation. Others, on the other hand, are concise and blunt, of those who do not hesitate to leave brief messages such as “we left it”, “I no longer love you” or “ours is over.”

Properly ending an emotional relationship is not only a matter of principles, respect and moral sense. Doing it right, having that last conversation, eases the grieving process and helps close stages. Otherwise, if one of the parties chooses not to say anything and disappear, the suffering in the other person becomes chronic and becomes a wound that always festers.

So let’s see how to do it in the best way.

How to end a long distance relationship?

A phone call? A videocall? By FaceTime , maybe? When physical closeness is not possible, we have multiple channels within our reach and, as far as possible, to end a long-distance relationship, written messages, audio, and even less messages left on voicemail are not worth it.

Interaction and dialogue are necessary. It is not only essential that we expose the reality of the situation, what we feel and what we want to do, it is also vital to let the other party have the opportunity to express themselves. You have to give voice, allow spaces and create a close setting despite the remoteness and the sensitivity of that situation.

Let’s delve into some keys.

Do not improvise, meditate before what you are going to say and how

When taking the step to end a relationship, one must have thought about it well. We cannot improvise, it is not correct or mature to say that ” we give ourselves some time “, and then resume the relationship and leave it again. One must reflect on their feelings, their needs, and their circumstances.

There are relationships that are impossible from the start. Others, on the other hand, are recoverable and worth fighting for. Some, for their part, always live on the tightrope, in that wire in which everything wobbles and nothing is safe.

Notify in advance

Once we have clarified how we are going to tell our partner that we want to leave the relationship, we must notify her, arrange a specific time of day.

The best thing to do is to proceed to send him a message saying the following: “I would like to discuss something important with you tonight. Would you be available for a video call at 8pm, for example? »

Somehow, through that notice, it is quite possible that the other person is already putting himself in context. The most common is that you experience some restlessness and if things are already going wrong in the relationship, it is likely that you intuit what is going to happen.

The three most important points: what I feel, what has led me to this decision and what I want

When ending a relationship, it is essential to have a final conversation. Either by video call or in person, there are a number of points that we cannot ignore:

• We must clarify with humility and courage what we feel: “ ours cannot go on, I no longer feel the same, or I think we should leave it because all we can do is hurt ourselves. I feel unhappy… “.
• Next, it is necessary to state the specific reasons that led us to that decision : “ I think that ours has no future because we do not communicate well, because we do not trust each other. Our interests are very different. My feelings have changed and the most logical thing is to leave this relationship “.

• Last but not least, we must make it clear what we want: “ I want to leave this relationship. However, I hope that you are well, that you can turn the page and have a happy life. “

Listen, make room for the other person and validate their emotions

Once we have exposed to the other person what we feel, what happens and what we want, it is time to see how our partner reacts. Give him space: if you want to cry, you must. Anger, sadness, annoyance, and even rage are normal reactions that should be accepted.

Do not promise things that you will not fulfill

When it comes to ending a long-distance relationship, we may be tempted to say that we will meet in person later to discuss the matter. Now, you have to be cautious with this. Because… is it really what will happen? Is it what we want once the relationship has been left from a distance? Will it really be possible to make a date when possible and pick up that conversation about the breakup?

Let us not promise anything that we will not keep. Don’t promise to catch a plane to visit or visit her and say goodbye in person if you don’t feel or want it. Be sincere at all times.

When ending a long distance relationship, do not cut contact immediately

When ending a long-distance relationship, we can think about deleting that person from our contacts permanently. Doing that elimination of social networks, Instagram, WhatsApp, can undoubtedly help us to go through the duel without falling into the temptation to regain contact or look at what photos they upload in their statuses and stories.

Now, when we have maintained an affective bond miles away from each other, technology being the only channel that united us, it is not appropriate to cut contact in the same second. Let’s let a couple of weeks go by at least. During that time, we can receive messages from the other person necessary to settle certain issues, necessary details with which to correctly conclude that relationship.

Disappearing minutes after breaking up with your partner through a call or video call would be like ghosting . Let’s try to do it a few days or a few weeks later.

To conclude, ending a long distance relationship is not easy. But when the conditions do not exist to do it face to face, we must adapt. The essential thing is to be consistent, courageous and mature: if love is no longer there, if we have stopped loving that person, let’s not prolong that nonsense, that deception any longer. Let’s do our best.