Happiness Is A State Of Mind

Books and conferences form a complete and convoluted showcase with different formulas for happiness structured around fuzzy constants. Many share the same error that exists in the most shared social idea: they place it outside of us. At the top of a mountain that is traveled by winding roads and steep slopes.

So, faced with this panorama, a question arises, and why does there have to be a shared idea of ​​happiness? A definition that serves me, my neighbor and the people who are on the other side of the planet. Happiness is still sensitive to circumstances and, therefore, to individuality. Perhaps, what we can talk about is complicated ways of being happy, illusions in the desert that when they disappear, they only leave a huge void.

Searching outside is a mistake

Everything around us urges us to seek happiness on the outside. If we buy that new car, we will be happy; if we have a partner, we will feel tremendously happy. Advertising says so: it is so tempting to “keep” biting the apple. The danger is that perhaps we speak of joy, and not of happiness.

Happiness seems more like a state, something that has to do with what remains and not with what takes less time to dissipate than the bubbles in champagne. An echo that survives emotions; whatever happens wraps us up. Perhaps we are talking about an ability to put the pieces of what happens to us together, so that we learn and feel good.

The power of our thoughts

If happiness is a state of mind, then our thoughts are the main players. A cast that, motivated by emotions or what happens to us, does not always interpret a script favorable to our interests. However, the positive is that we can intervene in that script. We just need to observe them. For this, it may be important to practice meditation.

Let’s identify the large number of automatic thoughts that we have in a day and that are complaints, judgments, laments, self-criticism … Being aware of this is very revealing. We will discover or re-discover a part of ourselves that we may have forgotten or that we may never have noticed.

If we see a mistake as an opportunity, if a dismissal as that push to change jobs (something we have always wanted to do), then we will be taking a big step towards that state of happiness. The fact favor  positive versus negative thoughts is key.

Feeling good does not mean that there are no negative thoughts in our mind; it will mean that this will be a drier place for them. As the one who is considered ” the happiest man in the world “, Matthieu Ricard, points out, to understand this we can think of the sea. Although its surface is altered by the wind or strong waves, deep down lies calm.

Many people understand happiness as well-being, others as balance. Not as something momentary, but something sustained over time. But for this to be possible, we have to find our own definition of happiness, dress it smartly, with pockets that fit our desires.

Getting away from this type of “truths about happiness” in which advertising puts so much interest can open a great space before us in which to decide what we want to be installed. More than buying or acquiring, it is about disposing and choosing wisely.