There Are Days When Everything Is Messy: Hair, Bed, Heart

Today everything in me is messy: hair, bed, heart. .. I no longer have someone to bare my fears and embrace my soul, but still, I promise you that I will pick up every lost piece, brush my gaps and braid my sorrows so that nothing this prevents me from dressing myself again with smiles, with hope.

Each of us has ever experienced these vital crossroads where, suddenly, everything seems to be in disarray. Our personal compasses no longer point north and almost without knowing how, we reached the edge of the abyss. Now, whether we believe it or not, in these moments we only have two options: to fall into that abyss and hit bottom or to be driven towards change, towards a new personal fulfillment.

It is curious to analyze for a moment, the etymological meaning of the word “crisis”. It comes from the Greek and derives in turn from two very interesting terms “the breaking of something” and the opportunity to “analyze” that something.

So, when our life is so messy that we do not even know with which foot to start walking, nothing better than to analyze each of our broken parts to understand ourselves better and then promote change. We suggest you reflect on it with us.

A messy brain trying to survive chaos

We know that this data may surprise you, but our brain has not exactly evolved to allow us to be more and more happy. In fact, each generation continues to have almost the same emotional and existential problems as its predecessors. Our “gray fabric,” so to speak, is no guru when it comes to happiness.

The brain has only one need: to ensure our survival. Hence, for example, fears, those instinctive mechanisms that turned out to be very effective for primitive man to defend himself from possible predators. Now, today, our fears are less concrete and more intangible: we are afraid of loneliness, failure, not being loved, not meeting certain expectations …

To this is added another essential aspect. According to a study published in the ” Review of General Psychology”  negative experiences leave a deeper imprint on our brain than positive ones. However, its purpose is clear: to provide us with new information in order to better survive in new life situations.

Therefore, the brain perceives those moments of crisis and personal disorder as “small threats” to our own survival. Hence, his “invitation”  to us to be able to better adapt to our contexts and for this, sometimes, there is only one way: change.

Keys to restoring order and finding our personal balance

When everything is messy, there is nothing better than sowing small pleasures in our daily lives. It may seem silly, but when our mind suffers from an excess of “past” and an extreme fear of the “future” there is nothing better than anchoring it to the present through simple and pleasant activities.

• Go for a walk, disconnect from the routine and what is usual in your daily life. In this way, you will see things from another perspective.

• Understand that living is above all making decisions. At every crossroads, the only thing that is required of us is one thing: to be responsible for ourselves.

• Making decisions requires adequate internal calm first. You may only feel the disorder of your emotions and feelings right now, but that moment will always come when you must stop and become aware of where you are and what you need.

• Try possibilities. Start by promoting small changes and see what happens. If you like the result, take a little bigger step, a bolder change and then you will see how many hills and mountains you can move.

In conclusion, although it may surprise us, in reality,  people should not fear so much these vital moments of personal disorder. Far from giving them a purely negative attribution, it is better to see them for what they are: temporary clouds without certainty that force us to open our colored umbrellas to weather the storm.