Masochistic Personality: When The Problem Is Me

Masochistic personality: when the problem is me

A person with a masochistic personality thinks that the problems are his fault. But, not the problems that can happen only around him, but also problems in which he has nothing to do.

Surely you hear a situation in which someone implies that someone is to blame. The person with a masochistic personality would immediately take for granted, even if he was not the direct culprit.

Since the masochistic person will always feel guilty, he will rebuild situations in which he will inevitably be hurt. She will seek the damage that she thinks she deserves, even if she doesn’t.

Traits of a masochistic personality

young man with mask and braid

Perhaps right now you are wondering if you have something of this masochistic personality, or if someone close to you is. The truth is that it is not very easy to identify them, unless we are ourselves.

Masochistic people carry that guilt inside and, sometimes, many people use it to throw guilt on them that are not true.

What characteristics does a person with a masochistic personality present?

  • They blame themselves for everything, they always think “it’s my fault, I deserve the punishment.”
  • When they are close to achieving success, they self-restrict themselves so that things go wrong.
  • Pleasant situations instead of celebrating them, they despise them.
  • They build their misfortunes, seeking pain and seeking the role of victim.
  • They sacrifice to feel useful.
  • They are falsely humble, as they have a narcissistic component.
  • They live in fear that there will always be a tragic end to everything.

Masochistic people live surrounded by fear, insecurity and are very dependent, but not in the sense that we see dependency, but in the sense that they need someone to witness their sacrifices.

In reality, this personality believes that his life should be like that of a martyr. Submitting to others, sacrificing yourself is what will bring you happiness tomorrow. But … they never reach it.

The lack of selfishness, thinking too much of others, doubting everything about oneself, make him a very insecure person who seeks suffering, pain and guilt to feel good.

woman face butterflies

Free yourself from suffering

After identifying what the masochistic personality is like, it is the moment when you ask yourself if you are really happy acting like this. It is true that helping others and sometimes sacrificing yourself makes you feel good. But to be guilty of everything? Allow yourself to suffer so that others are happy?

You’re not being happy, are you ? In fact, the day will come when you find yourself plunged into a very deep well that you will want to get out of, but you will not be able to. No one will think of you. They will just keep hurting you.

While you watch over your suffering, other people will take that to make you suffer more. If you don’t care about being happy, about being well, no one else will. You must worry about yourself. Being a martyr will not make you happy.

Think of yourself for a moment. You are not doing anything wrong! Practice being a little selfish, thinking about yourself and you will see how you will feel better. What’s more, you will even open your eyes to that reality that you have created for yourself.

You are not a bad person. If you suffer, if you submit, if you give your all, how can you continue to feel guilty? Free yourself from that guilt that resides only in you. You are to blame for that suffering because you allow it.

We all seek happiness, even you. Of course there will be situations in which we have to suffer, but this is not a maxim for every day! Be a bit selfish, think of yourself and be sure of yourself.

young man with leaves on face and neck

Do not allow yourself to make yourself feel guilty about everything, do not allow yourself to think that you are a bad person for not giving everything for others. You are worth a lot. You have to think about yourself. No one deserves to take advantage of your personality to hurt you even more. You are here to be happy, you are not in this world to suffer.

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